currently bored...

                Alright it's 8.40pm currently in malaysia time and i had no idea what i should do. i got wasted last night leveling up my dragon nest character (lvl 30-31) only one level -.- and spent the whole midnight(almost until 6am) andthe results was only 1 level up. today, i'm going to do the same thing only with coffee and cup noodles(coffee for staying awake and cup noodles so that i don't get hungry in the middle of the night)XD.

                 Right now, i am playing LOL for my 'first day win' bonus and i still could not get any matches through team builder -.-(damn). switching to normal bind pick soon.

                  Ever since the end of my SPM examinations, i have been spending most of my time playing these 2 games and as usual catching up to anime shows. i should be deciding on which college i should go for since everyone already have a crystal clear vision of their favor in their career. sadly, i'm still in jerantut, pahang(no college here that i like... or near). trying to take my mind off from future studies with games(quite pathetic i would say)... nevertheless, going in on a match now and will blog later.... if i can...

keep walking, don't look back.

                         It's finally over!!! my SPM is all done. 12 years of education and now it's finally finish. not sure whether should i be happy for finishing my education or sad the fact that i'll never get to study again... although i'm done with high school, there are still considerations being made to see whether will i want to go to college or not. not sure would i want to speed up my career or study a little further before exposing myself to society... at the moment, i planned on getting a part-time job and stay home most the playing video games for the whole december 2014 until comic fiesta.

                         Right now i am only playing 2 games (LOL: league of legends and dragonnest). Feel free if u wanna add me (LOL:tylerkiller and dragonnest:PROdigyXXX). i will be moving back to KL selangor soon since my hometown is there and after spending finishing school here, i got no reason to continue staying. i'm not sure what has changed in subang jaya while i'm away but i heard rumors that LRT station is being built there for easier transportation around the KL area. But since i already got a license and a car, i doubt i would be needing to go places through a train. petrol fees are killing me though :( nevertheless, since i rarely go out to places. i doubt i'll be using much fuel for the car.

                         A lot will definitely change that's for sure. i won't juz be a normal schoolboy anymore and new things will occur to my life from this point on(hopefully not drugs or smoke). the important thing is that we mustn't regret the decisions we made. on every challenge we faced in life, in our heads we always have that small little 'thing'(conscious) that tried to tell us which is the correct decision. ultimately, we're the ones who decides and picks it. either way, sometimes the decisions we choose may not be the way as we planned out to be. by now i'm sure u all know that EVERY SINGLE decisions has it's ups' and down side. if u were to choose between decision A and decision B, either decision will get u to ur goal but both has its 'good' side and 'bad' side, so what's the difference , why not we juz choose it randomly since both of them will give us the 'bad' side? it's quite simple really, we simply choose the decision that has the LEAST 'bad' effects on it. it is true that since either decision will cause some regrets it our heart. after choosing and living with the decisions we have picked, sooner or later we would start thinking "What happens if i had picked the other choice, everything would have changed if i had just picked that choice. Why didn't i picked it when i had the chance??? it was in my grasp and yet i choose this instead of that".

                          i'll be clear to u all that u won't get a better result if u choose another decision over the current one that u had picked. regretting it would juz be wasting ur time because u're pausing ur lifespan as u feel guilty over the course of the events that had happened. the best way to counter it is to continue with what u had planned to do and start all over from scratch while avoiding the same mistakes the next time u encounter the same scenario again. because u're always close to the door of ur goal. if u regret the decisions u've made, u'll be turning away from it.

                          With all that in mind, Always keep moving forward without fear. don't be afraid of the obstacles(decisions) when u face them. calm down and handle it with ur best moves. either planned out an strategic infiltration with ur knights or handle it slowly with ur small pawns(chess references)XD. anyhow, that's all for now. i'll be going on ahead and try my best to live my life to my fullest extension. i give u all the same blessings on continuing moving forward, GL HF :)

I'm almost there

                      Only a few more days until my SPM exams are over. there was a long pause between each paper and the longest one was between my add maths and chemistry(which is tomorrow). during this period, normally all students have been studying for their remaining subjects. but i wasn't, instead i was doing more stuff that i like(watching anime, improving my facebook page: www.facebook.com/cardfightvanguard and collecting some anime stuff). i guess i'm a little different from others... i'm in science stream and mostly all the students who went for science stream are the ones who has the most thinking caps being put on them everyday. well for me, i just kinda did it on a wimp i think.

                       I'm gonna be honest here, i never wanted to take science stream in the first place. before my PMR(form 3 final exams) i made a promise to myself that i'll go to account/economics stream and definitely avoid art stream(the lowest stream). After receiving my PMR results, i was shocked that i had 3A's and all of my other subjects are deemed as a passing grade and that i was given the option to go science stream since i got A's in science and maths(the requirements for entering science stream). at that moment, a lot of thoughts came to my mind about choosing between science and eco/acc. of course my parents would want me to enter science stream(duh, what parents wouldn't). but i wanted to stay true to myself and enter eco/acc, that's when something screws up my life and made me decided on picking science over eco/acc.

                        During the december 2012 holidays, my mom had a weird hallucinating problem thinking that our neighbors was trying hurt her and me-_-, the whole family(including me) told her that she was insane and nothing's going to happen. and that's when she begs my dad to take care of me instead of her. But since my dad is working somewhere far(not overseas) he decided to let my grandmother to take care of me..... in JERANTUT!!!!! somewhere in PAHANG!!!(if u have heard of it cuz that place is almost deserted). this means i have to throw everything i have away in selangor and start a new life in pahang. And the school i went to have almost every single of their subjects in the language of Bahasa Melayu(i'm not really good in it since i barely passed it in my PMR)...only in science stream, all the science subjects are in english, so pretty obvious what stream i would choose to enter. except the teachers who teaches these science subjects used BM and their English translation sucked.

                         The only way i could learn these science subjects is by buying a English reference book. thank god i drop physics, cuz i dun have to waste so much money all 3 of them(biology, chemistry and physics). also, my add maths teacher is a fucking retarded bastard who always picks on me just because i sucked at his subject. its not my fault since u teach everything in BM. i barely understand what his trying to explain. at one point, he even ordered me to report to the discipline room just because i wasn't able to complete his assignment(which is incredibly hard). and all i had to do was to explain some simple reasons to the discipline teacher and he understood everything(thank god he understands english) and let me return to my classes. it was barely a case. Another stupid teacher is a chinese teacher who kept telling me to take chinese subject since it's my mother's tongue. i told him that i went to an English primary school and that i've NEVER taken a chinese exam in my entire life!!! and he still told me to take it until i reach form 5 which i got we got a new chinese teacher that won't disturb and just let me do my thing.

                            It has a miserable life living here for 2 years straight until now. at one point, i even thought of running away from home and just live on the streets until i died(not relevent to my point). i endured it and tried to talk to my friends/bro, justin and sometimes greg(a little) and tried to express my feelings in a weird way for them not to understand(i don't want them to understand it, i only just wanted them to be there while i'm expressing it).

                             After 2013, i made a resolution that i would improve my anime lifestyle in this forsaken place and tried to study hard(not really XD) and endure it all the way up until now. A lot has happened, i got better in LOL(stuck in bronze elo hell though), opened a facebook page(www.facebook.com/cardfightvanguardstuff) dedicated to my anime life(it was for a japanese card game at first but what the heck XD) and learn how to photo shop(its about time). with all these things keeping me busy from my misery, time flies by in a single instant and now i'm on the crossroads of life that would determine whether do i get a education certificate or become a broken bastard with a crippled results.
 
                              It is at this point that i just want to express my thanks to my friends who has been there and helping me to get through this even though u had no idea what i was going through. i don't know how much i have endure, but for some reason i was happy to have gone through this path of in my life. i don't feel anything at the moment(probably drinking coffee got me hyperactive that i forgot to cry). nevertheless, i am thankful to be alive and that i'd accept to continue playing the game of life rather than ending it. pretty funny how my life is almost the same as one of my friends. father left and rarely comes back, crazy mother, a christian and love to listening music(anime version though) to express oneself. i started writing a blog because i felt the same pain as that friend(i'm sure u know who u r).

                               Recently, i was able to download an RPG game(dragon nest) thanks to Dickson(friend on mine here). A game that i have not been able to play for a VERY LONG time due studies during my form 3 years(PMR exams). ironically, i downloaded it during my SPM exams lol. i love playing it and i'm going to spend my holidays leveling up this game.
                                           

                                           DAMN, a lot of things has changes in this game

                                   Really excited about being able to continue playing this game and of course i'm not gonna get addicted to it, i'll perhaps find a part-time job to earn a few extra bucks and continue living up to my sweet anime lifestyle(looking forward to comic fiesta 2014).

                                    And i think that's pretty much it... tomorrow's my chemistry exam and i think i can handle it. other than that, i'm looking forward to my live. either i go down or up, i'm definitely not gonna end it until i see the full extension of my upcoming future( i think it's going to be LEGEN.........wait for it..........DARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD). see ya.